Who Me?

This past Friday wasn’t just any Friday. It was a Friday of surprises and a day that made me realize I had a lot of work ahead of me for this coming week. Why is that you ask? Friday I woke up just like any other day and started my IV the coffee pot. I headed for the office and sat down in front of my laptop. While scrolling through my emails, I had a list of posts ready for me to read from my blogging friends. I read a couple, posted some comments and pulled up the next post for me to read before heading off to grab my cup of crack coffee. Armed with my eye opening back up, I began to read the newest I’ll Have Nunavut post which had been posted by my blogging buddy The Zen Assassin. Expecting a new post and pictures updating me on my friend’s adventures in Iqaluit, I was quite shocked when I read the first line of his post-

“If you’re expecting a post about Iqaluit then you’re in for a shock. This has absolutely positively nothing to do with the Arctic so you’ve been properly warned…”

Holy Crap!

And with that, I had to read on. What was this mysterious post about? What could have cause the Nunavut blog to come to a screeching halt?

Well, it was an award. This is not just any award…….this was the MeMetastic Award! I was incredibly happy for this friend of mine and was excited to read on. You see, the recipients of the MeMetastic Award have three duties.

• The recipient of MeMetastic must proudly display the award in a post
• The recipient of MeMetastic must list 5 things about themselves and 4 of the 5 must be BOLD FACE LIES (thus readers must guess which one is the truth)
• The recipient of MeMetastic must pass on this prestigious award to 5 deserving bloggers.

After laughing for a bit at the list of 5 things he posted and narrowing the options down to two possibilities, I continued to read on and discovered that I was one of the 5 bloggers he chose to award the MeMetastic!!!

 

Can you believe it?

I looked around the room in disbelief as tears filled the corners of my eyes and asked my invisible audience……

“Who Me?”

(holding for applause but hurry it up because I still have to fulfill my duties here)

Thank you, Thank you very much

So first I would like to thank Zen Assassin for thinking highly enough of me to make me place this award that looks clearly like it jumped out of an acid trip on my blog! I love you too man! I would also like to thank my husband for google-ing “needing to have my wife committed” as I bowed, blew kisses and thanked my invisible audience. The academy can suck it because they still have yet to award me with anything other than a front row seat on my couch for their awards. Considering I have already fulfilled duty number 1, I will quickly move on to number 2 and get this show on the road. So without further ado, here is my list of 4 BOLD FACE LIES and one truth. I decided that I was going to make this a bit more difficult than what I have seen from other recipients. All of these have a hint of truth to them but only one of them is COMPLETELY 100% TRUE. Can you figure it out?

• I spent a week being paid to teach strippers in Southern California how to spin the stripper pole properly after a few strippers at a popular strip club injured themselves. During that week I had some help from a few famous people (who hadn’t yet become famous)  including Eve, who briefly made some money as an exotic dancer while awaiting her musical claim to fame.

• I was a victim of a home invasion robbery where I was held at gunpoint for over two hours. The criminals were captured following a sting operation where I had to contact the men by telephone (they had left a contact number with a demand for more money once the banks opened) and demand my stuff back. This was followed by a trial where I was the star witness for the District Attorney.

• I had a brush with fame when I was invited to submit pictures to Playboy when they were seeking a new “bunny”. I was only 20 and was talked into submitting my pictures by a close group of friends. My pictures made it through the first two phases but I was disqualified when  I was asked to submit my personal information and they discovered I was only 5’2. They were searching for a new “bunny” that was around the height of 5’6 because of a project she’d be working on.

• Shortly after becoming a teenager, my house was raided by the FBI. The house was completely torn apart in search of some “documents” and  I was escorted everywhere I went (even when I went to pee). When the search was over, I was taken to the police station where I was questioned for hours regarding the activity of myself and some of my family members.

• After years of attending professional dance classes at a well known dance academy, I was in position to be accepted as a member of a dance company for the performing arts where I was living. This opportunity would have paid for my college and given me an outstanding dance resume in a field that I loved. However, I chose to turn the opportunity down and drop out of dance altogether so that I could devote all of my time and energy into playing softball for my high school.

So there you have it. Now I am fully aware at how difficult it may be for you all to figure out which one of these is 100% true, considering there is a tiny bit of truth in each one, but I dare you to figure it out. My post tomorrow will be a follow up with the answer and the stories behind the truth and the four half truths. So how well do you think you know me? I’m not sure even Mr T may know the answer to this riddle………

Now on to my last duty, which is to pass this lovely award on to five other deserving bloggers. So, if you don’t mind, may I have a drum roll please?

1. Marina from the ever so clever blog Marina Sleeps
2. Kate from Random Musings of a Mad Mama
3. Melanie from The Past to the Present
4. Pie from A Piece of the Pie Hole
5. Deb from Dorky Deb

Now that my duties are done, I will get to typing tomorrow’s post with the answer. Congratulations to the lucky 5 bloggers that this award is being passed on to. You can visit the Memetastic Hop to link up if you are a recipient of this fantastic award. One has to know how far the Memeness has spread!

Until tomorrow my friends…….happy Monday all!