Would’ve Been
This week, actually at this exact moment, we would’ve been checking in to the National pageant in Southern California if things had gone according to plan. I don’t know why I expected them to, honestly. Things never go as scheduled for me. It’s nothing new.
But I guess I figured since the state pageant went so smoothly, the national level would work the same way.
Not so much.
As a matter of fact, this entire week was to be spent in Southern California in preparation for this National pageant my daughter was supposed to be participating in. We weren’t thrilled at the idea of spending Thanksgiving away from home, because we never have (it’s ALWAYS at my house), but we were excited for our daughter. She was excited. At least, it started off that way.
She took her title as the Nevada State Ambassador seriously and started working on fundraisers as soon as she was crowned. Pageant officials told us she was to compete in the National Competition for a variety of titles. Even though she had placed for Top Model and Miss Photogenic, what she was aiming for was the National Ambassador title and/or Queen’s title. To be a contender for for National Ambassador, she had some work to do. She had to acquire sponsorships and backing from her community and attend the pageant representing her state, as well as organizations and businesses from her community. That can’t be too hard, right?
While some people may have the health and the funds to travel across the state reaching out to those who may be willing to help, she/we don’t. We have to work and she has doctors appointments to go to. That was the first problem. But we thought that since Nevada is such a proactive state (when it comes to bringing attention to itself), there wouldn’t be an issue. And we though that since the gluten free/Celiac community was supposedly a tight-knit community that supported each other, there wouldn’t be an issue. Most importantly, we thought since we had family promising to help, there wouldn’t be an issue.
As of today, we’re not sure who we are most disappointed in.
But I’ll start from the beginning with a story of an unexpected visit that played a role in the demise of the national pageant. This all started before the state pageant had even begun. Would you believe it if I told you it started on Facebook?
ahem
I have family members on Facebook that I rarely speak to, for various reasons that I’ll get into later. But one of these happens to be my stepmom. As much as it has pained me over the years to try to get my dad and stepmom involved in the lives of my kids it has just never happened. For years I was the one who drove to them. And even at just an hour and half away, they only visited my house 3 times in 10 years. One of those times they didn’t even come inside and another time they were only at my hose for 20 minutes. I can’t imagine not being a part of my kid’s or grandkid’s (hypothetically speaking) life. But that’s another post for another time. The background of their lack of involvement is relevant to understand what unfolds here.
When my daughter was announced as a state finalist in the pageant, I was a proud mama and announced it on Facebook. And when she ended up in the paper, I was a proud mam and announced it on Facebook. And as the extent of my stepmom’s usual involvement in our lives went, she liked these statuses on Facebook. Ugh. In liking these statuses, everyone on her friend’s list got to see that her granddaughter was a state finalist in a pageant and she soon realized that it gave her some bragging rights. She shared the news with friends and at work and was happy to do so because she thought it was making her look good until she got an unexpected question……
“So when do you leave for the pageant?”
That’s when she realized how bad she was going to look to everyone.
That’s when I got a phone call.
Sitting in the infusion room with my daughter and my phone rings. I send it to voicemail but it rings again. After demon dialing my phone for 15 minutes, my stepmom finally left a message.
I knew there was a painful story, and i am relieved that the details are finally emerging!
of course i look forward to the next post.
thanks,
z
Unfortunately I’m full of stories but am happy to be writing again.
Even though your girl couldn’t make it to the state pageant, no one can take away what she’s already accomplished. (not even the silly parts of the family.)
I hope she can get over any disappointment, and keeps using her voice to raise awareness for Celiacs.
Mariah competed in state. She won crowns and placed in three divisions. She’s not disappointed in her accomplishments at all. She qualified 3 different ways to compete at Nationals this week. She isn’t the reason she’s not competing. That’s the sad part. More of the story to come…
Your daughter is a winner in my book!
Thanks Laurie
Damnit woman you and your cliff hangers!!
LMAO!!!
LOL, sorry
I am SO done with family. You’ve tried and tried and persisted and reached out and still you get smacked in the face! I can’t imagine what this message was about. You’re a stronger person than I am. You’re a good person Thy, don’t let ANYONE ever tell you you’re not! You’re immediate family rocks! I wish more people had family morals like you have!
Thank you.
So I shouldn’t expect a text message any longer?
Sorry. Got busy with baseball playoff tournament and forgot to text. I’ll text you right now.
Yo, mama! I think your daughter rocks. She has so much strength of character and wisdom for someone her age – I would tell you to be proud but you know, you are. Anyway, I’m sorry things didn’t work out the way she/you had hoped, but everything happens for a reason
You’ve made so many efforts and gotten so little in return – maybe it’s time to shut the door and spend your energy on yourself and your kids – and that old guy who drives the cab =-D
That old guy is a cranky bastard, isn’t he?
Yes, he sure is – and a shitty driver too! ;-p
Uh-oh….
I appreciate all of my blogging friends and enjoy getting to know you and your stories as well as your thoughts and opinions on mine. That’s obviously stated in the fact that I have some of your addresses and phone numbers.
However what I don’t appreciate are new readers who know nothing of the story or situation they are commenting on, unleashing their life’s story in a comment. Especially when it’s done IN ALL CAPS SO THEY CAN OVER-POWER THE OTHER PEOPLE WHO HAVE COMMENTED ON MY POST. I also don’t appreciate the nasty fucking bitterness that has been spewing out in many comments from this blogger. I’ve already had to remove a previous comment because of remarks about my daughter that weren’t acceptable and this was the final straw.
While I am not a step-parent, I know many people that are. My husband is a stepfather to my three children and he has been more of a FATHER than their own. So it will be a cold fucking day in hell when I allow an uneducated, ignorant blogger to claim that step-parents are not parents and should never be considered as such.
My advise to this blogger is to get to know the author behind the blog you are reading if you intend to comment in the fashion that you have been. Some background knowledge of the story and the people involved may make you look like less of an uneducated ass when you’re being nasty.
To any step-parents who may have read that comment before I was able to get rid of it, you are IN FACT a parent, and in most cases more of a parent than some give you credit for.
I like reading your thoughts and opinions on the things I’ve written and always appreciate a different view on a situation. But if you feel the need to attack someone, take it back to your own fucking blog………..
*drops the mic and walks off stage
Damn, woman! I heard myself in that post, lol. Rock on, chick.
What a strong little lady with a strong mama to boot!
I can see this one coming from miles away…..